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Self-Fulfilling Prophecy

Every time you state what you want or believe, you’re the first to hear it. It’s a message to both you and others about what you think is possible. Don’t put a ceiling on yourself. – Oprah Winfrey

I’m sure you’ve heard the phrase self-fulfilling prophecy.  But in case you haven’t, it’s a prediction that either directly or indirectly causes itself to become true, by the terms of the prophecy itself.  They can work in two ways, and the first way is great.  You believe in a good thing so much that it happens.  However, the reverse is also true, and you can believe in a bad thing so much that it comes true.  Case in point, me and math.  I always struggled with math in school, but I convinced myself that I couldn’t do it, and guess what, I couldn’t do it.  When we think something, and we believe something and we say something, even if it’s just to ourselves, we are giving it power – a LOT of power.  Why not talk ourselves into amazing and wonderful things?  Why do we say things, like “I’m so dumb,” or “I’m so fat,” or “Nobody will ever love me?”  Why aren’t we saying “I’m smart,” “I’m beautiful,” or “I am surrounded by love?”  I mean really, if you’re going to make something a self-fulfilling prophecy, make it something good.  The thing is, you are amazing, and so am I, let’s be our own best friends instead of our own worst enemies.  Let’s build ourselves up because there isn’t anything that we can’t accomplish if we just believe it!

What is Right for You

A big part of letting go is recognizing when it is time to stay in a situation and when it is time to move on. – Darren L. Johnson

Life is full of choices.  I’ve talked about it before, and honestly, it’s not a new concept to anybody.  We face choices every day.  Again, nothing new.  And we’ve also talked about moving on and taking chances.  But we’ve never talked about making a choice to stay.  Sometimes, we may see an opportunity to make a different choice, but we have to learn to weigh the pros and cons, and figure out what is the right move.  The right move isn’t always change.  Sometimes digging in and holding on with both hands is the best choice.  Don’t always feel that when given an opportunity that you have to take it.  You have the right to say no.  It’s all about what is right for you.  Sometimes that new opportunity is the best choice, and some times, you need to just stick with the status quo.  You need to ask yourself what is the best choice for you and listen to that inner voice.  It has hall the answers.  Nobody can tell you what is best for you.  You decide to stay or move.  As one of my students is so fond of saying, “You do you, fam,” and make the choice that is best for you.

It’s Up to You

No one saves us but ourselves. No one can and no one may. We ourselves must walk the path. – Buddha

Last week, I was having a kind of feel sorry for myself week.  To be completely honest, it’s carried over into this week, but that’s another story.  But at one point, I was feeling completely and totally overwhelmed with all my responsibilities, and a to do list that is probably longer than the bible at this point.  I was sitting there thinking that it would be so nice to have somebody to share the load with, and wouldn’t it be nice if my knight in shining armor rode up and rescued me from the drudgery that was my life.  But guess what, not only is it not up to said knight, I don’t need said knight.  I am a big girl, and I can take care of me.  That doesn’t mean I can’t ask for help, smart people do that.  They don’t try and do it all on their own.  But it does mean that my life is my responsibility.  This is my journey, and I need to take it.  Nobody can take it for me; they have their own journey to take.  So don’t be afraid to ask for help, but don’t expect anyone to dive in and shoulder your burdens.  They’re yours, but imagine the huge feeling of satisfaction you’ll get when you work through them all!

You are Strong

I survived because the fire inside me burned brighter than the fire around me. – Joshua Graham

Sometimes it can seem like your life is just exploding around you.  When that happens, it can feel like you’re literally being consumed by the flames.  The easiest think in the world would be to just give up, and let those flames consume you.  But the funny thing about fire is, if there is another, stronger fire, it tends to eat up all the fuel that the first fire needs, leaving it with no place to go.  Deep inside of you is that spark that can be fanned into the second fire – let it build up and burn all the negativity, drama and badness that is all around you.  If that’s too much fire for you, think about yourself as being the phoenix that rises up from those flames stronger than ever before.  I could come up with a few more metaphors for you, but I think you get what I’m saying.  No matter how much life may throw at you, no matter how much drama or stress, you need to remember one really important thing.  You are so much stronger than all of that.  You have these inner reserves of strength inside of you that will get you through it!  And not only will you get through it, you will be tempered by it can come out the other side stronger than ever before.

Believe in You

Believe in yourself and all that you are. Know that there is something inside you that is greater than any obstacle. – Christian D. Larson

Life can be challenging.  In fact, life can be down right difficult at times.  We fight, we struggle, we persevere and sometimes it seems like no matter how hard we try, we just keep getting knocked on our tushies.  I’m guessing sometimes you feel like you just want to give up.  I know I have felt that way on more than one occasion.  But here’s the thing.  No matter what life throws in your direction, you can deal with it.  In fact, more than just deal with it, you can stomp on it and smoosh it down into submission, or you can use it as a stepping stone to bigger and better things.  You have inside of you this spark, this special something called strength and it gives you power.  You have the power to rise above the challenges life throws at you.  You have a choice, you can let the obstacles beat you down, or you can rise above them.  Make the right choice and use the strength and power that is within you.  Believe you your strength.

Control What You Can

You have power over your mind, not outside events. Realize this, and you will find strength.- Marcus Aurelius

I have two stories tonight.  As a teacher, I get to go to lots of meetings, and deal with lots of initiatives, buzz words and directives from principals.  This year and last year, my principal’s directive was the same.  “Control what you can control.”  It’s short it’s sweet and it’s too the point, and it ties directly into my next little story, which in turn ties into the quote.   This morning, one of my students walked into my room throwing her stuff around and swearing up a storm.  I waited a few minutes and asked her what happened.  She was all upset because her grandfather had yelled at her and they had gotten into a fight this morning.  Then when she got to school, she felt like people were staring at her and talking about her.  She ranted and raved for a few minutes and then I asked her to read me the quote that I had just written on the board.  She did, and then I asked her what she thought it meant and after a few minutes, she broke it down and gave me a pretty decent explanation.  She then looked at me, at the board, and back to me and let out with a very sheepish “Oh!”  She realized pretty quickly that she didn’t have any control over what anybody else may have said or done, but she had control over her.  Or in this case, she started out with no control over herself.  Will she get it tomorrow?  Maybe not, but for a few minutes, she realized what the quote was saying, and she found her own strength.  How great would it be if we all could live our lives, remembering this.  What others think, say and do is completely on them, what’s on us, is how we react to it – therein lies our strength.

Hidden Strength

The strongest people are not those who show strength in front of us but those who win battles we know nothing about. – Anonymous

So this quote did not go the way I anticipated when I presented it to the kids at school today.  It actually went to a better place than I ever could have dreamed of, especially for my students.  They took it to mean, that you never know what someone is going through internally, so don’t judge.  I was psyched, because for them, that was extremely insightful and also super true!  That was not, however what I got from the quote.  I was hoping they would realize that, yes, everyone has struggles, and don’t judge, but more importantly, to look at people.  Really look at them and pay attention to what they DON’T say.  You can learn a lot about people just by watching them and paying attention.  You’ll see the people that get it done without looking for recognition, who keep the drama to a minimum, the ones you can count on.  They are the ones that have the real strength and they are the ones we want to emulate.

Find Your Strength

Strength doesn’t come from what you can do. It comes from overcoming the things you once thought you couldn’t do. – Rikki Rogers

I like this quote, I like it a lot actually.  I think, however, that I need to take it one step further.  Strength also comes from surviving the things you thought would destroy you.  I say this because often, the emotional struggles are the ones that seem completely insurmountable and wear you down the most.  So when you get through them, that feeling can be amazing.  The question is, how do you get through them?  If it’s a task that seems insurmountable, I won’t say it’s easy, but you keep plugging away, trying this, doing that and eventually you’ll overcome it.  Again, it’s the emotional that has me stymied.  I have a list of things I do when I’m dealing with emotional struggles, but I’m finding that my usual “standbys” aren’t working any longer.  So this particular quote has some meaning for me.  So while I may not have an answer, right now, I do know that whatever it is you may be dealing with and whatever it is, I’m dealing with, we can get through them.  It may not be easy but it can be done because you have something amazing to offer this world, and so do I.  We all do.  So keep reaching deep inside to find your way out of your struggles.  You are strong, you can do it.  I believe in you, just like I believe in me, and with faith like that, we can accomplish anything.

No Limits

Our imagination is the only limit to what we can hope to have in the future. – Charles Kettering

When I first read this quote, I was like “duh.”  But then, I started reflecting.  For me this is a no-brainer.  I have, and have always had a super active imagination.  In fact, I’ve been accused, far too often, of living inside my head, tv, and books far too often.  It boggles my mind when people say they don’t have any imagination, because they sincerely believe it.  In my mind, I can accomplish anything, and I have lots of great dreams and visions.  I sometimes lack the follow through, as I mentioned yesterday, but I can envision my dream scenario with so much clarity.  I can see it, taste it and touch it!  But what if you can’t envision it? What if you are limited because you think you have no imagination?  No!  Don’t limit yourself.  Stretch your imagination.  Explore the world in books.  Allow yourself to daydream.  Build that imagination…discover the joy in day dreams.  Envision the life you want to live.  You can do it.  Your future shouldn’t have any limits.

True Failure

Defeat is not the worst of failures. Not to have tried is the true failure. – George Edward Woodberry

Time for some brutal honesty here. This quote is really painful for me because it it’s so darn close to home, as in nail on head, home run close.  I was listening to a webinar on tapping, and doing some serious soul searching last week, and I came up with a realization.  I was thinking about why.  Why am I not successful in following my dreams, and why I procrastinate so much.  I am afraid to fail.  It’s the main reason I procrastinate so much.  If I delay in starting, there are no expectations, or if there are, they are pretty low, so there is little chance of failure.  I don’t know when this thought process started.  The first time I can remember REALLY procrastinating over something was junior year in high school.  That’s the big research paper year where I went to school.  I remember falling asleep over the typewriter trying to get my rough, first and last draft done.  What that means is there was no draft, there were no notes, no note cards, no outline.  I just put the paper into the typewriter and started typing.  It worked okay, I got an A, and that’s how I’ve written ever since then.  No plan no outline, I just go – with no editing after.  My procrastination has gotten worse since then.  I wait until the last second for everything – just because I don’t want to fail.  So reading this quote, it really hit home.  I talk all the time about it being okay to take a chance and not succeed, but i don’t let myself do it.  So, I’m going to try and work on this and figure a way to get over this fear I have, because it’s true, I really only fail when I don’t try.

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