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It’s Not a Competition

I was talking to a recent college graduate, and this person was lamenting their difficulty in finding a job in comparison to some of their friends.  Now this particular group of friends all went to different schools and majored in everything from music to engineering and everything and anything in between.  Nobody went to the same school, and nobody majored in the same thing as anybody else.  This particular group of friends have known each other since elementary school, and remained friend through elementary school all they way through college and now the adult world.  They cheer each other’s successes and support each other through challenges.  And now, this one friend is struggling because several of the others have found well paying jobs while they are still uncertain about what they want to do.  It’s been causing this person a lot of inner turmoil, and while they are not resentful of the success of their friends, they are starting to feel like they, themselves are a failure.  The thing is, they aren’t a failure because it’s not a competition – at least not against their friends.  The only person they need to better than is the person the were yesterday  or the day before.  And as I told this particular person, that’s a competition you are winning because they are not the same person they were in high school, or in college, or even the same person they were last week.  Don’t waste time comparing yourself to other people and trying to measure your success with a ruler meant for another person.  Your only competition is against yourself and as long as you continually strive to be better than you were yesterday, you’re going to be a winner!

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