Do Not Be Defined

I think it’s very healthy to spend time alone. You need to know how to be alone and not be defined by another person. ? Oscar Wilde

Learn to enjoy your own company.  Don’t let yourself be defined by anybody else.  Make your own definition of who you are.  When you’re with other do not be definedpeople, you very naturally adjust your behavior to make the people you’re around happy.

In some ways, it’s not a bad thing.  We need to conform a little bit. There are certain social morays that need to be observed. It’s how society works.  It’s why we have rules and such.  But what this quote is talking about is when you change who you are because of the people around you.  Do not be defined by who they are or what they want.   You need to be true to yourself.

The easiest example I can give is when two people start dating.  Often you’ll see one half of the couple give up all the things they like to do, or the people they like to hang out with, to embrace the things the other person likes.  They find themselves spending all their time  at monster truck shows, or spending lots of time at the mall.

It’s a terrible trap to fall into.  Spend time getting to know yourself.  Find out who you are and your place in this world.  Do not be defined by the world around you, instead define the world around you.